Educational Vs. Academic

I was talking about christmas gifts to a co woker recently and as all parents,I'm sure, I was complaining about toys and the "too manyness" of them.  I was remarking that this year we were asking for memberships to various places and during this conversation my co worker stated that b/c we homeschool we must only want "educational" toys.
Hmmm, That is pretty much not exactly true.  What is traditionally considered "educational"; things like Leap frog products and Dora the explorer and anything that is made to outright act like an academic teacher is just not allowed in my home.  I dislike anything that pretends to teach.
I Am Learning All the Time
In my opinion toys should be fun but that is not to say they wont be educational.  My kids learn a ton just from playing with each other and working out compromises with very simple tools: some stuffed animals, some Star Wars people and a Hess Truck or two..  Nobody would really call those educational (and truth be told I do think too many toys are a hindrance to learning) however the education lies in the team work in the sharing. Creativity is where kids brains get the most exercise so in that I find Traditional educational toys a bore for the brain (although often the lights and the sounds make kids happy)  Dolls that don't "do" anything until the child breathes life into it by sheer imagination and stuffed animals that are loved so strongly that they become part of the family do more for kids brains than a frog teaching them to read at ever decreasing ages.
So yes I like to have educational toys but not academically teaching toys.  Santa wont be bringing a toy lap top or Leapsters to teach my kids foreign languages.  

 Rosetta Stone will be responsibe for spanish and I will be responsible for Latin and math.  The books will be in charge of reading and Miss Diane will take care of Piano lessons.  In this way to toys are free to just play and quite frankly I think "shadow" has come a long way in learning his Roman numerals.
I much prefer my kids teaching the toys than the toys teaching the kids; academics anyway.

You must be so patient

Homeschoolers raise your hand if you ever hear these words, "I could never homeschool.  You must be so patient"  Now keep your hands up if you are really THAT patient.  I saw those hands go down.  When people say that to me I always say, "Well you know that's a myth we homeschoolers like to keep alive b/c it makes us look good"  It generally gets a laugh and I follow it with the truth. There is no way I could ever be as patient as they are to have to follow someone else's rules about how my kid should and must be learning, socializing, waking up, eating for lunch and whether or not my kid is at "grade level"

I don't think it takes any more patience to homeschool your kids than is needed to raise them.    So that is not to say the job is without effort just that effort is only equal to having kids anyway.
I find the stressors of homeschooling to be only about parenting woes and I am glad that it isn't exacerbated by someoone else putting pressure on me and my kids to be at some arbitrary level  they deem appropriate.
The number one "issue" that I hear over and over in my homeschool circles is trying to make time to teach the older one when the little one is underfoot.  Sharing comes up and even bossiness of siblings;  things that are just part of the whole parenting package anyway.
 Mostly, we are happy to go slowly to help a struggling kid learn to spell and we are happy to challenge the quick study with frequent trips to the library or more math puzzles.
Better Late Than Early: A New Approach to Your Child's Education


Patience is required when stuck in traffic on your way to meet friends to see the Statue liberty and more patience is needed when it turns out you are never gonna get there.  However , a report on the Statue Liberty will not be "late" and no one is going to fail the test on what is written at the base.
As homeschoolers we only require as much patience as is needed to meet  the day to day life existence but rarely do we need to muster up strngth to hear someone else tell us our kids aren't applying themselves.
We get to choose and that is truly the blessing of the whole thing.

The social experiment needs a change

It has been said that school is the biggest social experiment of the time of humans.  I see the President calling for "Education reform"  I see zero tolerance policies expelling small children for toy guns, I see the NJEA claiming to care about students but seemingly caring more about Superintendents inflated salaries and I see bullying gone so far as to cause young people to take their own lives.

Oh yes we need reform but not in the form of longer days, stricter classes, harder tests.  We do not need more school.  We need less.
Children need one on one supervision and care.  Children need to be heard.   Children need to play and they need to wonder and they need to make mistakes.
They need adults to guide them and show them right from wrong.

You can't win a battle with a bully by legislating behavior or using zero tolerance polices or lenghty assemblies on bullying.
Bullying starts and ends with self confidence and an abiltiy to  feel empathy.  This is milestone and kids don't have it immediately.
Throwing them all together in a classsroom where emotional needs of all can not be met is the makings for bullying. 
I know not all kids can be homeschooled.  It's just not reality.    However while the subject is on Education reform, let's stop and think what the kids need not what we think will make them into smarter faster little robots that can outperform other countries.
Let's slow them down, let them create and show them that the adults around them care about them and will guide them through difficult feelings.  Show them we care more about how they feel  than we care about math grade.
Sounds like an impossible plan , I know.; However as long as reform is on the table let's really reform it and not just make it stricter and firmer. That's not reformation.  That's just more of the same.

Socialization is the number one question people ask about homeschooled kids.  How will they make friends everyone wonders.   My biggest mistake in homeschooling was letting the worry about making friends more important than family life. It's not that I don't think kids should have other kids to play with but it isn't the be all end all that we sometimes think it is.  I think there is a school mentality that is so pervasive that it influences how children are raised. School is not the answer to social children.  With cliques and bullies the experiment shows over and over that children's basic needs are  being neglected yet the rules just keep stricter and kids are being expelled b/c the school can't deal with any infraction (Hey they might get sued for the 5 year old bringing the toy gun to school) 
If the school can not deal with teaching the child then maybe that's where reform needs to start.  Not with grades not with test scores but with making the school enviornment one that meets children's needs.

Let them play let them learn. 

So how do you like your parents?

A shoulder shrug.  A bored or irritated expression.  So the asker wonders, "hmm I guess they don;t like their parents.  They would probably be better off with other parents.  If they had other parents these kids would answer, 'We love our parents!!  It's great and so much better than having other parents'
Or maybe the inquisition begins with, "So how do you like life?"  Again my kids stare off wonder about this odd question and get bored and want to leave this place where people ask strange questions and make them feel "on the spot"  

Well my kids aren't asked those exact questions but they are sometimes asked, "So how do you like homeschooling?" 
Of course it would be great if my kids gushed on about how great it is and how we go to so many museums, and have so much free time for playing and they learn at their own pace  but sometimes mommy rushes the pace but we understand b/c we are well adjusted (more so than you school types)  and incredibly bright for our age. 
..but they don't.

My kids stumble on that question everytime and I see the wheels turning in the askers head. "AHA!" they think.  These kids would rather be in school" 
My kids have never been to school so the question "how do you like homeschooling?" requires a comparison my kids can not make. 
They would prefer not to be interviewed about ths homeschool stuff and would rather go on not feeling different.  They feel like regular kids and do not know why people are so hung up on this subject.