Friday, February 18, 2011

My Homeschool village


Quoting an old African proverb Hillary Clinton was quoted as saying, "It  takes a village to raise a child".  I will tell you, I think people misunderstand this.  At the time I remember people taking umbrage at this b/c they didn't think it was OK for their neighbor or some other unknown to be telling their kid how to behave.  I get that.  I, as a libertarian attending a UU church with a high democratic population; as a homeschooling mother who believes in  letting the kids get dirty, REALLY dirty and take risks that might cause them some harm(tree climbing, fence climbing) I get that when some stranger reprimands you (or your kid) acting as some unknown authority that they know what's best, I get a litle indignant myself.
However I really do believe in "it takes a village" it's just that in this amazing fast paced world the village does not mean your neighbor in the wig wam, or igloo or even just the condo next door. 
 I have created a village for my children with our homeschooling community.  These are people with whom during a "playdate" the moms  (or dad but it's rarely dads simply b/c the dads are usually working in the day.  We do have some dads but it's few and far between )stay for coffee on purpose to chat. 
 My kids' friends are my friends' children.  So a playdate  often is a time for moms to catch up over coffee while the kids play. Sometimes the play dates are drop off if the "other " mom needs to run errands or has a change in a work schedule.  Since we know each other and the children pretty well few instructions are needed if any. 

  
My village, through my kids eyes, is place where they can play but also feel secure with the parent of the other kid.  They call adults by thier first names , some adding the formality of "miss" before the name.  The kids' lives, however are not seperate from the family even with friends.  The line between family and friend is slightly blurred .  As mothers and as parents we share the same goals.  We know each child's struggles nd personal history.  We know who is allergic to what thereby Birthday party offerings , such as, "Gluten free" "Peanut free" "No artificial colors" and "Vegetarian" reflect our intimate knowledge of each other's children's needs.
Our children learn and grow up together but not the same.  Sometimes they struggle to get along and maybe a parent helps to guide them.  Maybe they will be life long buddies and maybe they will grow aprt but the connection to the homeschool lifestyle is what keeps our village strong. The kids don't change friends each September.  Even as new kids are welcomed into our community the "old" freinds are still constsant.   We mothers lament over sibing discourse together , we share schooing ideas and parenting ideas.  We work together.    We are package deal and we are a a village even if we live miles and miles apart. 

1 comment:

Janet Costello said...

Thanks for sharing that! Alot of it hits home. You should have told me you have a blog - I'm a follower now!

Janet
www.iblog4boys.blogspot.com

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